I’ve been hearing a lot from students and observing people’s frustration with trying to understand and find unity points with those who are oppressing others or enabling those who oppress others. Sometimes finding unity points with someone who is racist or sexist or any other “ist” can feel like you’re supporting that person and therefore their oppressive behavior. However, hating someone and focusing on their worst points only makes them more that way and is binding to you, not them.
Love is for your benefit, not just the benefit of the object of your love
When you hate, it’s an awful feeling, right? It’s heavy and toxic, it keeps circling in your mind over and over. That is the binding effect of hate. Your hate only brings you down. Love is seeing Self in another. If you can find a way to recognize that the object of your dislike is also you, to find some ground for unity, it frees you from that feeling. You can then look at the person objectively and make sound decisions how to interact in a way that is rehabilitative, not just destructive.
Where your attention goes grows
If you put your attention on the worst qualities of someone, you are essentially watering the weeds. Finding unity points and turning your attention to someone’s best qualities, even if you have to imagine them as an infant, you are helping to…
